Ruby - Astari Boedikoentjara
How do you know you’re not missed?
Try to walk away and disappear
Who’s going to reach out to you?
Seriously, who?
You’re probably offended
She longs for peace
like the soft wind’s breeze
to help her sleep
cast off the creeps
She longs for dreams
The dawn isn’t close enough,
yet I am jolted awake
from a dream that felt
like a time machine,
throwing me back to the past, so mean.
How can you catch a break
at the never-ending hurdles before you?
The bumps and cracks are nothing new.
More endless tasks to finish too.
Sysyphus must’ve been a human pinball,
Say what you like,
do what you will
Let your words be the strike,
if you're in for the kill
Say what you mean,
Break his spells
You might as well
Never say his name
End his game
We know what he is
“Patience is a virtue.”
Yeah, right.
At least according to you.
“There’s no point in this fight.”
Nothing wrong with patience.
Have I put myself on exile for too long,
that solitude no longer feels wrong?
Just hollow,
a vacant space without a vibrant soul.
I’m afraid to forget
Like a vehicle with a quarter of petrol in your tank
or the last 50 in your bank account
Like a tired athlete after a marathon,
groaning at another round
Like an endless conversation
I believe there’s a reason
your shattered heart’s been revealed
even when you refuse to mention
or worry you may never heal
I know I’m just a stranger
Your ignorance is not my bliss
but what do you care, right?
Not so much you miss
yet alone I must fight
I’ve stopped expecting you
It’s that rare ability
to push aside your emotions
Lock them all within
so you’re left to feel nothing
Voices of the worried