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The Englishman

He is an Englishman!

For he himself has said it,

And it's greatly to his credit,

That he is an Englishman!

For he might have been a Roosian,

A French, or Turk, or Proosian,

Or perhaps Itali-an!

But in spite of all temptations,

William Schwenck Gilbert

King Borria Bungalee Boo

KING BORRIA BUNGALEE BOO

Was a man-eating African swell;

His sigh was a hullaballoo,

His whisper a horrible yell -

A horrible, horrible yell!

Four subjects, and all of them male,

To BORRIA doubled the knee,

They were once on a far larger scale,

William Schwenck Gilbert

Lost Mr Blake

Mr. Blake was a regular out-and-out hardened sinner,

Who was quite out of the pale of Christianity, so to speak,

He was in the habit of smoking a long pipe and drinking a glass of

grog on a Sunday after dinner,

And seldom thought of going to church more than twice or - if Good

Friday or Christmas Day happened to come in it - three times a

week.

He was quite indifferent as to the particular kinds of dresses

William Schwenck Gilbert

The Disagreeable Man

If you give me your attention, I will tell you what I am:

I'm a genuine philanthropist - all other kinds are sham.

Each little fault of temper and each social defect

In my erring fellow-creatures, I endeavour to correct.

To all their little weaknesses I open people's eyes,

And little plans to snub the self-sufficient I devise;

I love my fellow-creatures - I do all the good I can -

Yet everybody says I'm such a disagreeable man!

William Schwenck Gilbert

Emily, John, James, and I

EMILY JANE was a nursery maid,

JAMES was a bold Life Guard,

JOHN was a constable, poorly paid

(And I am a doggerel bard).

A very good girl was EMILY JANE,

JIMMY was good and true,

JOHN was a very good man in the main

(And I am a good man too).

William Schwenck Gilbert

King Goodheart

There lived a King, as I've been told

In the wonder-working days of old,

When hearts were twice as good as gold,

And twenty times as mellow.

Good temper triumphed in his face,

And in his heart he found a place

For all the erring human race

And every wretched fellow.

William Schwenck Gilbert

The Policeman's Lot

When a felon's not engaged in his employment,

Or maturing his felonious little plans,

His capacity for innocent enjoyment

Is just as great as any honest man's.

Our feelings we with difficulty smother

When constabulary duty's to be done:

Ah, take one consideration with another,

A policeman's lot is not a happy one!

William Schwenck Gilbert

The Pantomime Super to His Mask

Vast empty shell!

Impertinent, preposterous abortion!

With vacant stare,

And ragged hair,

And every feature out of all proportion!

Embodiment of echoing inanity!

Excellent type of simpering insanity!

Unwieldy, clumsy nightmare of humanity!

William Schwenck Gilbert

HMS Pinafore: Act II

DRAMATIS PERSONAE

The Rt.Hon Sir Joseph Porter, K.C.B. (First Lord of the Admiralty)

Captain Corcoran (Commanding H.M.S. Pinafore)

Tom Tucker (Midshipmite)

Ralph Rackstraw (Able Seaman)

Dick Deadeye (Able Seaman)

Bill Bobstay (Boatswain's Mate)

Bob Becket (Carpenter's Mate)

William Schwenck Gilbert

An Appeal

Oh! is there not one maiden breast

Which does not feel the moral beauty

Of making worldly interest

Subordinate to sense of duty?

Who would not give up willingly

All matrimonial ambition

To rescue such a one as I

From his unfortunate position?

William Schwenck Gilbert

The Family Fool

Oh! a private buffoon is a light-hearted loon,

If you listen to popular rumour;

From morning to night he's so joyous and bright,

And he bubbles with wit and good humour!

He's so quaint and so terse, both in prose and in verse;

Yet though people forgive his transgression,

There are one or two rules that all Family Fools

Must observe, if they love their profession.

William Schwenck Gilbert

Eheu Fugaces -- !

The air is charged with amatory numbers -

Soft madrigals, and dreamy lovers' lays.

Peace, peace, old heart! Why waken from its slumbers

The aching memory of the old, old days?

Time was when Love and I were well acquainted;

Time was when we walked ever hand in hand;

A saintly youth, with worldly thought untainted,

None better loved than I in all the land!

William Schwenck Gilbert